Far From The MCC
~ Est. in 1998 ~
“Bodleian Succomb To
New-Look FFTMCC Bowling Attack”
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Sunday 23rd
July 2006 |
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Result: Won by 9 Wkts |
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Venue: |
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35 overs |
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Bodleian |
102 - 8 |
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S. Parkinson 2 - 14,
A. Mann 2 - 17 |
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FFTMCC |
106 - 1 |
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I. Howarth 63*,
S. Dobner 30 |
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Libraries, the last
bastion of quiet, decency and shelving systems named after ducks. Much
evolution has taken place since the days of shush, study and contemplation.
Surely the “So you won’t take
scorebooks, even ones with A. Mann and a very rare J. Hotson five-for?”–
Questioned FFMCC captain “No, that’s eBay you
idiot…” retorted the Bodleian captain. “Anyway my colleagues in “Tell you what –
I’ll let you win the toss and we’ll forget the whole thing – anyway he turned
into a butterfly and died.”
We can also kill your wife for
£1,000. And so it was that
under Oxfordshire skies the Bodleian went out to bat. FFTMCC nemesis,
erstwhile electrician, East Oxfordian and almost-guaranteed fifty-maker
Yousef, set out to the middle arms-wielding, hungry for batsmen-bowler
FFTMCC-fodder. Not long after, he returned, head down, victim lbw to a Stevie
P beauty, having gorged himself briefly on Steve’s traditional loosener for
ten. P returning the impressive figures of 7 overs, 4 maidens, 14 runs and 2
wickets – which may be a Mad maiden record or may not – you’ll need to ask
Matt, or check on Martin’s new kitchen wall. A. Mann opening from
the other end was unaccustomed to seeing a batsman not having plundered six
of the previous over and able to play him out. Two wickets for the Ant-Mann
and a start of a new opening partnership – Thommo and Lillee, Wasim and
Waqar, or Stan and Laurel – you pays your money and takes your choice. Spread
the word, the Mad has bowlers now.
Kim was shocked to see Steve
holding a baby after his wicketkeeping display. The Bodleian top
order destroyed, the librarians were open for the onslaught of M. Reeves and
A. Small. Adie on debut with a fully-committed four overs, one wicket for
twelve. Reevsie, with a mean spell of three overs, one wicket for nine runs –
support bowling of the Jones / Hoggard kind. Such was the performance of the
attack, that D. Edwards was forced to leave the field in a one-man protest
action against the strength of the Mad bowling – I’ll write that again – Mad
bowling – weird. Captain I. Howarth,
aware of the opportunity to hit the foot holes left by the four horseman,
tossed the ball to his spin attack. The spin tandem of T. Smith (4-1-8-1) and
‘Warnie’ Bullock (4-0-8-0) set out to bamboozle the lower order with their
mixture of offies and leggies. Smith extracting exceptional turn from outside
off, including the ball of the game and champagne moment winner – pitching in
the corridor and hitting leg – an absolute jaffa. Warnie had passed the
gloves mid-game to Steve “I’m never keeping for the MAD again” Dobner who
proceeded to demonstrate why Kim doesn’t let him hold the baby. The Bods
sensing discretion was the better part of valour began to dig in, having
played themselves in Kaufmann (30*) and FFMTCC Fantasy Cricket entrant
S.Arnold (23*) shared a backs to the wall 9th wicket stand of 65*,
taking advantage of the errant but tidy Edwards (6-0-11-0) and debutant
bowler and fine-entrapped debutant buffet QC (1-0-6-0). The Bodleian thus
hauling themselves from the mire and giving their bowlers something to go at
102 - 8 off their 35 overs.
A rare cover drive during Captain Howarth and
batsmen / keeper / bowler / multifunctional-cricketer S. Dobner started the
FFTMCC innings – buoyed by Kev’s seafood special, they swashbuckled their way
to an excellent start. N. Hebbes poised to go in three had padded (out of
necessity not willing ill on fellow team mates), netted, partially unpadded,
re-padded and then sat. Then did the scoreboard, then sat, then shouted
supporting, and then sat. Howarth peppered cow corner as Moo boy winced, and
Dobner supported ably. The openers continued accumulating with Howarth
reaching a long overdue fifty. Hebbes was joined in the sitting by QC,
fresh-faced, Goose-spectacled, and keen for batting-action when Dobner fell
for a cultured 30, youth was given it’s chance and QC sent out for the
formalities. Despite little time to impress, QC showed his signature, sweep /
swish / leg paddle for a well-timed four, finishing on a well-deserved 7*,
and Howarth continued making hay to a quick fire 63* - seeing the Mad home to
106-1 in an impressive 17.4 overs. N. Hebbes unpadded
and went home to find his library books were overdue. ‘Titanick’ |
*
MOTM:
Champagne Moment: T. Smith’s
ball of the century
Buffet Award: A.
Cavanagh’s blackberry crumble pie
Hat
Lore: Most
hats cast far too much shadow for team photos