Far From The MCC
~ Est. in 1998 ~
“The Real Lord Lucan Returns,
On Day of Comedy Dismissals”
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Sunday 29th
July 2007 |
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Result: Won by 41 Runs |
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Venue: Jordan Hill |
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40 overs |
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FFTMCC |
164 ao |
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I. Howarth 36,
R. Hadfield 35, S. Parkinson 31 |
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OUP |
123 ao |
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A. Mann 4 - 20,
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The rain had finally stopped. Finally. After 3 months of relentless downpours, flooding and untold misery in
the
Jordan Hill had
covers, but they leaked – so the teams played on a mud track. * * * It also seemed like 60 years ago that With several Far From The MCC regulars enjoying an Indian batting
masterclass at Trent Bridge, and others watching stunt planes dive in and
around bridges in London – it would be a tribute to the strength in depth the
Mad now enjoy that they were able to field a decent team. Although the
ability of the side remained good, the now familiar Mad crèche at pitch side
was bare.
Jake and his
arithmetic – a marriage made in heaven. J. Hotson, his hair slowly returning after going skinhead for
charity, would bring back memories of 2004 when last he opened for the Mad
with The score had reached 66 when Hotson (9) next fell, bowled by Breeds
(3-43) after attempting to hit the ball off the wicket; but Jake had
resolutely done his job by seeing off the opening attack. M. Clarke (9) next
joined Parkinson at the crease, and looked the part until he fell foul of a
debatable lbw decision given by his skipper. Clarke would later protest the
ball hit his bat first (probably lies), but was more aggrieved by Howarth’s
apparent smirk as he sent him on his way. This incident would later be argued
about during the tea interval and the Fines Committee, and the whole sorry
saga would further be fuelled by an apparent photo of the incident on the
skipper’s camera!
R. Hadfield
finally found the middle of the bat on his way to a handy 35. After much promise and excellent beginnings, Parkinson (31) went soon
after after slapping the ball to a waiting mid off. Such was his annoyance,
and obviously now playing up to his tag of King Cobber, Parkinson’s smashed
his blade into the pitch sending cuds of turf everywhere. For a second he
panicked – players and spectators alike would have taken a very dim view of
vandalising the strip; but fortunately the large crater was a foot wide of
the popping crease, so he left to much OUP laughter before depositing his kit
in the nearby tennis courts. It was fully 7 years ago that R. Hadfield had bludgeoned an OUP
attack on his way to posting a highest Mad score on debut, and since that
historic event the impostor who had been turning up under the name of Lord
Lucan had, quite frankly, batted like he had eyesight problems. Today was a
different matter altogether, and after passing his previous best score (since
THAT knock) with a boundary, he helped T. Smith (16) push the Mad score along
to 133 before Smith was superbly caught in the outfield by a sprawling Joe
Organ.
Petr (right)
became the 97th player to represent the 133-5 would quickly become 140-7 as D. Shorten (1) avoided a duck,
and A. Mann didn’t – both the victims of an embittered and clearly irked M.
Clarke who not once smirked at their downfall. Mr. Small now ventured to the
middle wondering what exactly batting was all about – this was after all his
first knock of the year – even though it was the end of July. Alas he was to
witness the sorry end to R. Hadfield’s (35) merry knock, and that of a
recovering M. Bullock (4) – who couldn’t quite arrange his internal workings
after 38 pints of CAMRA ale the night before. With A. Morley a no-show, the
Mad were grateful to one P. Benisek for filling the void. Petr, or Petr Cech
as some guys would nickname him, became the 97th player to
represent the Mad in all it’s incarnations. After strolling to the wicket
decked out in cargo pants and a blue T-shirt, he began by unfurling a
graceful smear through gully for a couple, before leaving a straight one and
watching it crash into his stumps. Maybe Petr was confusing cricket with
baseball? But nevertheless, the Mad welcome their Czech Import to the fold,
and their 3rd left-hander – ever! 164 all out with A. Small stranded on 8 not out, just 92 short of his
maiden century. A decent effort, but the consensus of the Mad team whilst
they munched their way through the OUP teas, was that it was maybe 20 or 30
short of what they should have got. Well maybe; and maybe they would have got
nearer 200 if they hadn’t given each other out lbw or demonstrated the art of
the comedy dismissal?
“Buy your own fucking beer!” Hopes of a successful OUP chase were quickly dented on the resumption
of the match after D. Shorten (8-3-20-1) accounted for OUP skipper R. Mann
lbw for 8; he didn’t like the decision, but maybe he should have used his bat
instead of his pads? K. Thompson (0) quickly followed via an authentic cricket dismissal as Clarke pouched a rare outside edge off A.
Mann, which left the Paper People tottering on 21-2. But in Heron, the OUP
possessed a batsman of classical grace who could bring the game round for
them in most situations. Unfortunately then on 19 he decided to top-edge a
woeful leg-side delivery off Howarth to a gossiping D. Shorten at fine leg.
Despite Dave later bemoaning his topical conversation with Stevie P being interrupted
by the flow of the game, he did take a well-judged and important catch –
probably in the knowledge that if he had grassed the ball he would NEVER have
heard the last of it! Howarth then (6-0-20-2) followed this dismissal up by
trapping Halsey in front for 14 and the OUP innings again began to falter. This pattern of OUP batsmen getting starts and getting out would be
repeated for pretty much the length of this contest; with S. Parkinson
(8-1-29-2) and A. Small (7-0-26-1) reaping the rewards of a deteriorating
pitch and poor shot selection. Parkinson rattled timber, and Small howled in
delight at clinging onto a sharp caught and bowled off Organ (6). It was left
to Australian left-arm self-doubting swing legend A. Mann (7.4-3-20-4) to
exact rights on the OUP innings and discover playing cricket is actually fun
once in a while. He did for the dangerous J. Thompson (16) with a
middle-stump Yorker; hit the wood once more for the pugnacious Tomkins (12);
and finally wrapped proceedings up as Breeds (1) saw the umpire raise his
finger after he shuffled in front of his stumps. The Paper Boys were all out
for 123.
Cricket in the
sun? Surely not…. A fine 41 run victory over a more than handy OUP team; and a game
played out under blue skies and sunshine for the first time in what seemed
like years. Decades even…. Cricket can be fun you know? When it doesn’t piss down for months on
end and reduce everyone to lethargic melancholy old men bitching about the
sun-kissed summers of years gone by…. Roll on August. Roll on cricket. ‘Spam’ |
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MOTM: S.
Parkinson’s excellent all round display
Champagne Moment: A. Small’s
caught and bowled
Buffet Award: A. Small’s
tiny finger buffet