Far From The MCC
~ Est. in 1998 ~
“The Final Frontier”
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Sunday 9th
September 2007 |
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Result: Won by 4 Wkts |
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Venue: Aston Tirrold |
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Time |
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Astons CC |
122 ao |
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A. Mann 4 - 9,
J. Harris 2 - 14, M. Reeves
2 - 16 |
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FFTMCC |
123 - 6 |
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S. Parkinson 39,
D. Edwards 38* |
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And
so with a splash of dazzling sunshine we reached the end of the season. An
occasion for a hero to put his finest foot forward. A hero who has spent
years wowing great British crowds to their feet with deeds of athleticism and
vigour. I am of course talking about Tim Henman whose house overlooks the
splendid vista of Aston Tirrold, home of the Astons Cricket Club. For the
record, his house is an impressive but drab affair. He apparently has a
tennis court in the grounds and could be heard shouting abuse at his missus
and assembled guests for the last BBQ of the year. Allegedly he comes to
watch the cricket, so why not us? Did he have a sneaky look from his third
floor loo and decide the standard was not up to much? He’d have been wrong.
Tim Henman’s pokey council house. Trains,
planes and bikes (Mr. Parkinson’s lycra should get an asbo) brought us from
all over the country. Would there be a hero in our throng? Would someone with
big feet and a big heart step forward to take control of the match? We’ll
find out readers. We’ll find out…. * * * Colonel
Mustard greeted us one and all on arrival. A 6ft 3 beast of an OAP with every
weekend of his dwindling years spent umpiring with the officialdom of Dickie
Bird. A wink and a Masonic scratch on ball five of every single over
certainly caught those of us sharing umpiring duties unaware. “Is that old
man making a pass at me?” I thought as another four was whipped to the
boundary by Dan the
A. Mann (bowling) rolled back the
years in a champagne display. Being
the professional outfit we are we all got dressed and took to the field.
Inspection of the wicket revealed an alopecia style strip with a swarm of
little flies to keep everyone on their toes. The flies are well known for
their love of cricket and indeed have recently started their own league with
other flies from across the south east of Oxfordshire. They are only small of
course so have opted for a 20Twenty league and who knows - may build up, over
time, towards test cricket? Good luck to them. Our
big footed hero (with his big heart) stepped forward and began his earnest quest
for glory. A. ‘McGrath’ Mann (9.5-6-9-4) bowled with precision and swing and
frustrated the decent looking opening partnership of Smith and Clark. Clark
soon fell to Mann followed by Smith, the victim of Mann’s first catch of the
day. Dew the captain followed and Mann was looking to at a hat-trick as well
the possibility of taking all 10 wickets. He was on fire.
D. Edwards’ steak pies got no
mention in the match report. S.
Parkinson (7-2-19-0) kept the runs down at the other end and the pressure
mounted. It was almost as if the whole season, day and innings was leading to
what would happen next…. M. Reeves running in to bowl with energy bursting
from every sinew, the ball swinging into the batsmen, a swing of the bat,
leather flying over mid on and a certain four…. wait, A. Mann is leaping into
the air, he’s literally taken off, time has stopped, the ball has slammed
into his right hand, he’s landed, he’s gone and fuckin’ well caught it! A
momentary pause and the team run from all corners of the ground to slap
backs. What a catch…. Collingwood, Jonty Rhodes would have been proud. Our
tail was up, with more wickets for Reeves (6-1-16-2) and J. Harris (4-0-14-2).
There was smoking on the pitch but quickly snuffed out by a rather tetchy
Dickie Bird. Fags out (though smoking was resumed just off the pitch shortly
after), apologies all round and back to the action.
Really gripping stuff, guys. Our
fielding was excellent with fine stops, catches and throwing to our very own
Mr. Bullock behind the wood. Our Captain for the day, Mr. Dobner, made his
claim to take over from A
fine spread for tea, more Henman spotting and some scratching of heads as we
tried to understand the bizarre rules. Moo and Danny Boy took to the field
loud and proud, confident of seeing off the runs in one go. It was slow
going. The pitch was not easy with variable bounce and a bit of swing. Still,
a decent start before Moo (0) was bowled by Napper. He was unlucky. The ball
didn’t bounce. In walks Lucan playing a cover drive for four and back foot
off drive for 3 (the author indulging in two of his own shots – forgive me
and fine me). And then a short ball, low bounce, bat on ball, ball span backwards,
nudged stump, single bail fell off and their whole team jumped, leaped,
shouted, kissed and embraced. Is Lucan (7) that good? NO. Napper had taken
his 500th wicket (over 19 years). A great achievement and no
consolation whatsoever for Lucan.
D. Edwards’ 38* anchored the Mad
innings home. The
batting continued with Steve Parky playing well for 39 including a six. His
last innings for the FFTMCC for a while as he migrates somewhere up north – a
fool of course. The north smells and they can’t play cricket (apart from * * * From
a personal point of view it’s been a pleasure to play a few times this year
and contribute a few runs in at least one match. I look forward to the AGM
and nets in the winter. A.
Mann - man of the match and champagne moment. His day. ‘Lord Lucan’ |
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No
Fines on this Day |
MOTM: A. Mann’s
bowling and spectacular catch
Champagne Moment: (yawn) A.
Mann’s bla bla bla
Buffet Award: J. Hoskin’s
vegetarian chilli (with mushrooms)