Far From
the MCC fines 26.4.09 v Wootton
& Boars Hill (a) lost by 43 runs
25p unless otherwise
stated.
|
Name |
Fine |
Reason |
Cost
|
|
Dave E. |
Golden
Duck |
Bat missed ball,
ball hit stumps |
£1.00 |
|
|
Cultural
Ignorance |
Not performing
Haka at start of game |
|
|
|
Alcohol
Avoidance |
Low level alcohol
consumption at lunch |
|
|
|
Poor
Pre-match Net Performance |
Trying too hard |
|
|
|
(Donation) |
Lack of small change
due to recent banking collapse |
|
|
|
|
|
£2.00 |
|
Matt |
Duck
Avoidance |
He brought it, but there wasn’t a pond |
|
|
|
TVR
Avoidance |
He didn’t bring it |
|
|
|
Disrespecting
TVR |
Apparently he wants something with a decent boot |
|
|
|
|
Caught with his gloves off |
|
|
|
|
|
£1.00 |
|
JP |
Average
Protection |
Willing Dave E. to take a swipe |
|
|
|
Dropped
Catch |
Ball hit hands, then ground |
50p |
|
|
Short
shorts Avoidance |
We know he owns a pair |
|
|
|
Over
Use Of Suspense |
Waiting until final ball of spell to take a wicket |
|
|
|
Fraternising
With The Enemy |
Pretending he’s friends with everyone in Australia |
|
|
|
Poverty |
Poor investment choices |
|
|
|
|
|
£1.75 |
|
Martin |
Losing
Toss |
He wanted us to field in the sun |
|
|
|
Golden
Duck Avoidance |
Twice is unlucky, 3 times would be a habit |
|
|
|
Comedy
Fielding |
Grass can be a funny old thing |
|
|
|
Artificial
Wicket Confusion |
Grass can be a funny old thing |
|
|
|
Listening
To Ian |
He’s the only one who can understand him |
|
|
|
Low
Self-Esteem |
Listening to Ian |
|
|
|
Failing
To Live Up to Expectations |
Time will tell |
|
|
|
|
|
£1.75 |
|
Dave S. |
Cultural
Ignorance |
Thinking Dave E was an Aussie |
|
|
|
Talking
To Women of Non-Wife Kind |
Distracted in field by female admirers |
|
|
|
Pub
Avoidance |
He’s got plenty of cider at home |
|
|
|
Causing
Mild Panic |
Arriving a last minute despite living locally |
|
|
|
Minor
Cob |
Disputing living locally |
|
|
|
Espionage
Avoidance |
Not frequenting the drinking dens of the opposition
despite living locally |
|
|
|
Opening
Bowler No Wicket |
Neglected to realise the importance of his job |
50p |
|
|
|
|
£2.00 |
|
Ian L. |
Duck |
Bat missed ball, ball hit stumps |
50p |
|
|
Wearing
Children’s Shoes |
Likes Velcro |
|
|
|
Salsa
In The Field |
Cricket talent is lacking |
|
|
|
Sulk |
Cannot except that cricket talent is lacking |
|
|
|
Over
Keenness |
Needs to make up for lack of cricket talent |
|
|
|
|
|
£1.50 |
|
J-Mo |
Living
In A Fantasy World |
Sometimes reality can be scary |
|
|
|
Helmet
Rejection |
Take it or leave it |
|
|
|
Hypochondriac |
Dismal attempt to fake Swine Flu |
|
|
|
Mini-Cob |
Not really a cob, more an expression of joy |
|
|
|
Potential
Rebellion |
Disputing cob accusation |
|
|
|
(Donation) |
Lack of small change due to recent banking collapse |
75p |
|
|
|
|
£2.00 |
|
Darley |
Toe
Cap Avoidance |
Over intensive front foot impact |
|
|
|
No
Gloves |
Could be nasty |
|
|
|
No
Box |
Could be very nasty |
|
|
|
No
Cap |
Bad hair-do revealed |
|
|
|
Selling
Illegal Kit |
Living up to his name |
|
|
|
(Donation) |
Lack of small change due to recent banking collapse |
75p |
|
|
|
|
£2.00 |
|
Dan |
Duck
Avoidance |
He brought it, but forgot the plum sauce |
|
|
|
Bribing
Umpire |
He was plucking his duck, despite lack of plum sauce |
|
|
|
Not
Bringing Full Batting Skills To Bear At Crease |
Was shaping up well in the nets |
|
|
|
Heavy
Sighing |
Getting angry is not an option |
|
|
|
|
|
£1.00 |
|
Ian H. |
Ball
Avoidance |
Lack of spatial awareness due to over indulgence (over
last 20 years) |
|
|
|
Comedy
Dismissal |
Lack of usual bat movement |
|
|
|
Weak
Bladder Display |
Lack of bladder control due to over indulgence (over
last 20 years) |
|
|
|
Losing
The Toss |
He didn’t stand a chance |
|
|
|
|
|
£1.00 |
|
Steve D. |
Being
Dissed By Wife |
Required for childcare duties |
|
|
|
Childcare
Avoidance |
Insisted on batting |
|
|
|
Suicidal
Running |
‘Yes, No, Come on!’ |
|
|
|
Fines
Avoidance |
Repaying childcare debt |
|
|
|
Harassing
Umpire |
The Laws of Cricket are open to interpretation |
|
|
|
|
|
£1.25 |
|
|
|
|
£17.25 |
|
Duck |
£0.50 |
|
Golden
Duck |
£1.00 |
|
Out
Playing Reverse-sweep / Switch-hit |
£1.00 |
|
Dropped
Catch |
£0.50 |
|
Opening
Bowler No Wicket |
£0.50 |
|
Opening
Partnership Avoidance |
£0.50 |
|
Smoking
on the Pitch |
£0.50 |
|
Drinking
on the Pitch |
£0.50 |
|
Missed
Stumping |
£0.50 |
|
Missed
Run-Out |
£0.50 |
|
Fines' Folder Abuse |
£0.50 |
|
Impersonating |
£0.50 |
|
Having a Major Cob |
£0.50 |
|
Having a Parkinson’s Cob |
£1.00 |
|
Insulting the Fines Committee Chairman |
£0.50 |
|
Insolvency (maximum limit) |
£1.00 |